I can feel them. Everytime it gets cold they make themselves known. If I'm careless brushing my hair, their presence is felt. The plates and screws in my skull.
Like the feeling of getting up too fast, my conscious brain leaves me. I wake up to faces of panic. Confused and exhausted. Has someone just beat me up? Did I get hit by a train? No, just a seizure.
My body is racked with pain. I've peed myself again. I hear them talking, but it makes no sense to me. So very tired. My head is filled with white noise. I can taste the heaviness of blood.
Yes, I can hear and understand you. No, I don't want to get up, drink water, have a conversation, answer questions. Just let me be. Let me sleep. I've biten up my tongue and cheek. Ha ha.
How long did it last? Did I hurt anyone? Is everyone ok? Am I ok? Let me try to get up. The pain is unreal in my back. I am embarassed and humiliated by my own body. I need to change clothes.
This wasn't part of my life's plan. Brain tumor and brain surgery were never up for discussion. Seizures and a broken back were not on my bucket list of things to do before I die.
Ok. So this is me. Wonky brained, but oh what a personality. I wish I could've been left with some awesome new talent like telekenisis or something. Nope, just me, but with new subconscious dance moves.
Oh, and the damn plates and screws in my skull.
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